Because You're Worth it, Too!

While awake early this Monday morning (it's currently 6:21a.m.), I thought to myself, "I should post on my blog."  Side note: "thought to myself" is a really silly phrase--who else would you think to?  Well, actually, I thought, "I should post on my blog--I haven't done that in a while.  I better post soon or people might be disappointed!  They expect me to write something!  I have to think of something to write about!"

So as I walked around the house, getting this and that ready for Jeremy, I was trying to come up with an idea--any idea--to write about so that I didn't disappoint any of my faithful readers.  Then (why yes, I am chronicling my whole morning via my thoughts--thanks for noticing!) I thought, "That's silly!  I'm my own person!"  And--no offense to all of you lovely people--but, I don't need you.


Now, I don't mean this in an angry way, like we just had an argument and I'm determined to do things for myself, so I storm off yelling,

"I DON'T NEED YOU!"

Or in a way to put you off or tear you down,

"I don't need you..."

Or in an, "Oops. Sorry, I called for the wrong person,"

"I don't need you."

But rather in an I-don't-need-your-validation-to-know-who-I-am-or-to-be-a-"good"-person kind of way.  Furthermore, whether or not I post on my blog in no way dictates whether or not I am a "good" person.  My dignity as a human being and my role as a daughter of God determines that.

This understanding of dignity and worth is something that I think has been lost, at least in my generation it has (though I imagine it's happened before in history and/or in generations prior to mine).  Society tells us to be the best person we can be--in and of itself, not a bad message.  The problem is in what qualifies us as best: we are the best we can be if we make the most money, have the best job, have the nicest car, buy clothes from the best stores, etc. etc.  In a nutshell, we are the best person we can be if we have achieved and acquired certain things--simply being ourselves is not enough.  I was reading an article yesterday that a friend posted on Facebook.  It was not only sad to read, but it was also a commentary on our society as a whole.  I enjoy numbers, data, and the conclusions you can draw from them, but living according to a 'numerical representation of self-worth' can only lead to self-deprication, lower self-esteem, and a misunderstanding of self-worth.  But like the author said, it's not so much about the numbers, it's the value they (we) place in the numbers.

Personally, I don't care how many people I'm friends with on Facebook, or if Jeremy's picture of Baby G has more "likes" than my picture of Baby G, or if Jeremy's blog has more followers or page views than mine.  But, I do care that I may not live up to your expectations.  I (and I'm sure I'm not the only one) need to remind myself, in instances like this morning, that

I don't need you,

and that the "expectations" I'm not living up to are not your expectations, but the expectations that I have decided you have for me (nice of me to decide that, right?).  And above all, even if they were your actual expectations, whether or not I live up to them doesn't matter.  I am a wife, a mother, a daughter of my wonderful parents, and ultimately a daughter of God.  Therein lies my dignity; Therein lies my worth.  So, today I will embrace my dignity and know my worth, and tomorrow I will remind myself again:

You formed my inmost being; you knit me in my mother’s womb.  I praise you, because I am wonderfully made; wonderful are your works! 
          ~  Psalm 139:13-14

And, just in case you forget, in the words of L'Oreal Kids,

...You're worth it, too!